wet dream: being financially secure with a career i enjoy
Pluto becoming a planet again has really taught us that if we complain hard enough about something, we can change things, even on a planetary level
when will 5sos’ thick accents return from war
How to Be Happy
1) smile when you first wake up.
shine your pearly whites the second your eyes open, and laugh for absolutely no reason.
it will start your day on a good note, even if it takes you a little longer to get out of bed.
2) skip the coffee.
your mom was right when she said caffeine can do crazy things to you.
try something soothing like an herbal tea, it will taste just as good without making your hands shake any more than they already do.
3) try to eat three meals.
it doesn’t matter if its as big as a turkey dinner or as small as a piece of fruit,
it’s just important to make sure something substantial is in your stomach so you don’t pass out.
remember that your body is a temple and it deserves to be taken care of.
4) think positively.
focus on the good things in your life, rather than dwelling on all the negatives.
don’t think about the looks that girl gave you when you walked into school,
instead think of how you ignored her and sashayed your way into first period.
look on the bright side of everything.
5) thank yourself.
remember that you woke up this morning, so that in and of itself is an amazing accomplishment.
you are here today, and although you are weeping and sad,
you deserve a gold medal to have survived this long.
be proud that you will make it to feel the suns warmth radiate throughout the cold winter.
6) talk to everyone around you.
you have a right to say whatever is on your mind in this world,
so use your voice to compliment that girl’s outfit you love,
and hear her to talk about her favorite pair of shoes that no longer fit.
everyone has a story to tell, so stick around a few more minutes to hear it.
7) keep the sass to a minimum.
just because you are having a horrible day, doesn’t mean you have the right to be rude to everyone around you.
if you were happening to have a good day, you wouldn’t want someone to upset you for no good reason.
karma is alive and well, so respect all and you will be respected as well.
8) shower every day.
it does not matter whether you have done nothing but watch netflix all day, or rolled around in the mud like a pig, you must clean yourself properly.
it isn’t just hygienic, it will also give you a chance to clear your mind and reflect on your day.
9) stick to a sleeping schedule.
the amount of hours you sleep will make a huge impact on your emotional and physical stability, so plan to end your day early.
skip the late night study session, because your health is more important than that one grade will ever be.
10) repeat tips 1-9.
it may take a while, but you will eventually be able to throw up that smile, and it will no longer be fake.
there will always days where you will feel far from your goal of happiness, but stay strong and think positively, and you will come out gleaming and victorious.
Me when guys don’t like me
one of my favorite ron swanson lines
I really can’t wait to find a girl who I can just have fun with and love like crazy. Someone who is my best friend and wants to eat pizza at weird times of the night…but also someone who I can make smile and who I can kiss whenever I want.
A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them
No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.
UR SO STUPID
the comic is killing me
what I want to do for halloween:
what I’ll end up doing on halloween:
my goal is to be the ‘we didn’t notice her in highschool but damn we should’ve’ girl